The Magic Carpet

As most of you realize by now...that OTHER stuff that has the Baseball media and SAH* twisting to keep their VG booty-shorts from getting all twisted up (hint: Let 'em ride up the hips, they stay better and look wonderful~!~!~!) isn't going to get much air here on The Magic Carpet, but I will post that old quote which explains why...written by the best dialogue guy ALIVE, David Milch, for his 'Deadwood' character, Al Swearengen, who was immortalized by the incomparable, Ian McShane;

"I'm a purveyor of spirits, dope included, and when chance affords, a thief, but I ain't no fucking hypocrite"

Whatever Guru's flaws may be, and they are too numerous to catalog - they do NOT include judging people I do not know for behavior that does not offend me. Bill can spend his days turning young things into humidors and ballplayers can do whatever it is they do to prepare, we're cool.

Oh, and to this observer, the hard-body workaholic who treats his job and body like a finely tuned tool-of-the-trade is no concern - as opposed to the talented schlub who reports 20 lbs. overweight, sheds 10 and proclaims himself 'ready' - he is screwing me AND his team far more.

Guru is a SS/3B and the difference is WEIGHT...fit and trim are what you need to play baseball at whatever YOUR best is. That mattered to me when I was in my athletic prime and the most I ever got paid was $400 a month and a monkey-free room in Costa Rica...today, in my mid-'40s and relegated to only Softball, my skills will always separate me from the modest competition and the belly isn't going to change that. But every step on the field is not what it can be because of the weight and the impact it makes on a players center of gravity. Moves that have been second-nature since little league are altered when you aren't trim, you risk injury and you cannot achieve excellence (unless you're Babe Ruth or Tony Gwynn!).

Bottom line? Spring Training is Boot Camp, try and shut out the noise about gossip, drugs and paychecks and focus on what really matters about this process - all are FIT and stay HEALTHY.

Let's hope that the World Baseball Classic and the SAH* do not take any important players out due to health or stupidity, let's see HEALTHY rosters doing their fighting on the field, in the GAME. I cannot remember the last season the Yankees didn't have serious injuries change the season before June and with 4 Starters playing big innings in the WBC.

1.) Yankees in the World Baseball Classic

13 Yankees will be on WBC rosters.

Jeter is the lone USA player (more in a minute)

2 - Mexico (Alfredo Alceves, Jorge Vasquez)
2 - China (Zhenwang Zhang, Kai Liu)
1 - Panama (Jahdiel Santamaria)
1 - Italy (Francisco Cervelli)
6 - Dominican Republic (Alex Rodriguez, Robinson Cano, Melky Cabrera, Damaso Marte, Jose Veras, Edwar Ramirez)

I will be watching warily...happily (for health reasons), Chien-Ming Wang (Taepei's Ace), Jorge Posada (Puerto Rico's Catcher), Hideki Matsui (Japan's LF) and Mariano Rivera (Panama's, well really the WORLD's Closer) will all remain safe in the Tampa Sunshine with their trainers.

What is SO amazing about the game and the way it has changed, is the Yankees have a team that actually looks like the City they play in...with players on 6 of the 16, representatives from 3 others kept out and have also had players who would have been eligible to play for Australia (Graeme Lloyd, '96 World Series hero), Cuba (current 1B/DH backup, Juan Miranda COMES from the national team, but his defection precludes him playing..., and of course, El Duque!) and Venezuelan Bobby Abreu was a terrific Yankee who we wish well (LOSE THE WEIGHT, Bobby...love ya, but if you want to know why Bobby struggles at the wall - check above his belt).

They've had 4 Canadian Players, the first in '05 and the last in '06, that's 1905- Jim Cockman (hmmm...stop it!) and 2006 - Aaron Guiel. Guru cannot find any Korean-born Yankees, but certainly Byung-hyum Kim has carved out a memorable place in their history.

So that is 14 of the 16 Countries who've been represented in Pinstripes. Cannot find any from The Netherlands, and no player has yet come to MLB from South Africa.

2.) The Mighty Dominican Republic

While we are talking about the WBC...how about the Dominican Team?

Vladimir Guerrerro is out. Carlos Pena can't play. David Ortiz may not play.

That's a T-O-N of offense to lose, right?

This is how they might roll with such debilitating losses:

LF Alfonso Soriano
2B Robinson Cano
1B Abert Pujols
3B Alex Rodriguez
DH Manny Ramirez
SS Hanley Ramirez
RF Jose Guillen
C MIguel Olivo
CF Melky Cabrera

Not to mention 2B Placido Polanco, SS Jose Reyes, 3B Aramis Ramirez, 3B Adrian Beltre...

They don't scare you with Offense at C and CF, but Olivo and Melky will provide Defense. They are overwhelmingly RH offensively (that is where they need Papi and Pena...) and the USA will try and give them a steady diet of Oswalt, Peavy and Verlander to take advantage of the lack of balance...

Still, Pujols, Rodriguez, Ramirez at 3-4-5 is a historic assemblage of lumber.

The story on the Hill is just as impressive...Fausto Carmona, Edinson Volquez, Francisco Liriano, Ubaldo Jimenez, Johnny Cueto in the rotation mix with a FEAST of power arm relievers.

The DR is loaded and likable.

3.) So Gu, WhoYaRootinFer?

Didn't I just give it away?

I love my Captain, but #2 is in deep with a cast of creeps on the USA roster.

Guru don't root for the likes of Roy Oswalt, Jake Peavy, AJ Pierzynski, Chipper Jones, Dustin Pedroia and Kevin Youkilis...can't hide those boys behind Red, White and Blue...

I must commend Youkilis, for his remarkably adult and sensible comments re: Affair d'Alex, but did you hear Oswalt? That guy is a piece of shit from the bottom of the pits of hell.

How perfect that he and Houston found one another!

Anyway, with Alex, Cano and Melky in the lineup, joining Alfonso and Manny and Pujols and Marte, Veras and Edwar in the pen...make this Yankee fan's WBC cap read;

'DOMINICAN REPUBLIC - 2009 WBC CHAMPIONS'

* Society of American Hypocrites (no, no, no..this is NOT another name for the 'Cato Institute!)